Print this articleReflections on grief and a whirlwind of love
by Joyce Ten Have, Staff Poet
Dear Tom,
I thought you deserved a letter after experiencing my upheaval over seeing you guys. Where it stems from is my grief. Maybe some of my grief from losing Aunt Jean and Mom; it spills out, if you don’t watch for it. I also have an ache in my heart for not seeing Anna and Marina as much as I want to. So I have grief of not visiting—not visiting Andy, not visiting you, and not visiting Mom. And life is so temporary. Those two girls are growing up without me seeing them. It is so definite and there is no room for the push and pull in life. It just is… Anna and Marina are growing up and Aunt Jean and Mom are no longer with us.
I feel like I’m a lousy Aunt. Where Aunt Jean and Aunt Penny and Aunt Ruth have been good Aunts. I have only been a part of our family a little and instead I agonize over this. I want to have a temper tantrum. Throw up my arms and legs, beat on something. I want to see those girls before they grow up to be adults and I miss them so much.
Love, Joyce
What can
You say about
Aunt Jean.
Throw
Your arms up
And
Love her
She was a storm
Of love for me
All my life.
She taught me Bible school
Bought me clothes that were in fashion
Brought me McDonalds when I was sick
My first poems were of Aunt Jean
People responded to them
We published.
Aunt Jean
Is
A whirlwind of love
My Aunt Jean in a nursing home
Died the other day
We miss her